Man Up Stand Up

Too unfit to masturbate, shouting out wrong name during sex, going to Hooters, midget humor, old PSAs. Road rage, grocery shopping with the wife, people living to ridiculous old age, hating vacuuming, going bald. Marital fighting, celebrity poker, gambling, complaining. Getting caught checking out a girlfriend, girlfriends' friends not liking me, engagement ring shopping.

Living with women, shampoo bottles and eating healthy. Need bigger laughs. The only thing more embarrasing then buying maxipads is returning diapers. My math books didn't have math stuff on them.Sitting next to the fat guy on the plane. The uggliest man I've ever seen.Pimp My Ride always over does it. Misleading commercials, Home Depot.

Stalking grocery store clerk on myspace. Fireplace DVD's can be dangerous. Drunk dialing ex GF's, old time letter writing. Douglas hates rappers bragging about how much money they have. Rims keep getting bigger, pretty soon guys will be riding on 5 thousand inch rims... My ugly friend can say anything he wants to the ladies. Working out.

Gerald Kelly loves King Kong Vs Godzilla. I saw my ex girlfriend and she was pregnant. The Kama Sutra is a bunch of bull. Need to pump up laughs.PC Guy vs Apple Guy.Dan had a dream that boxer Oscar DeLahoya was having sex with his wife.

Beware of the Red Headed gang... Psychic man hitting on woman in NYC. Making old man noises when you sit. The greatest Dancer who ever lived. Stalking women on facebook. The football kicker has to tackle these cyborgs. The office women annoy him; fat lady pretending not to want cake, and girls planning lunch. Carnival Cruise is like a floating trailer park.

Being the last of his friends to get married is like being the last man standing on the battlefield. Why can't I wear Pro Wrestling gear in public but you can wear basketball jerseys? Kegs for kids. Brian knew his wife was going to leave him when her magnet poetry got hostile. Calender Hunk job, hunters. The way to get out of trouble with your girl is to propose to her.

Sam Tripoli is confused by the frantic reactions of every victim in a zombie movie! Living with your girlfriend is like being trapped in a cave. When attacked punch a shark in the eye. Speeding to get a lady bug off windshield. Old School Nintendo rocks!