The Half Hour

Rory Scovel takes comfort from Southern pilots, enjoys sex shop browsing and detests airport security.

Michael Palascak discusses his fear of ghost babies, his mixed feelings about SUVs and living with his parents after college.

Na'im Lynn describes how to secure a South African bride, the benefits of an alcohol colonic and why racism is counterproductive.

Neal Brennan explores depressing BBC news reporting, erotic photography of male bodies and his feelings about President Obama.

Nick Vatterott does his best to avoid offending his fans, explains what he loves most about Halloween and imitates an unusual comic and a hardcore baby.

Brendon Walsh discusses everything from the postcoital thoughts of Fleshlight owners to the joys of wearing a fake mustache.

Theo Von shares his feelings about the PT Cruiser Convertible, fantasizes about the best way to spend money and explains his text-based friendship with a total stranger.

Maronzio Vance faces off with a mall kiosk employee, fantasizes about a store that would make dating easier and reveals a compliment he gave that went horribly awry.

Joe Mande shares tales of Twitter warfare, describes a terrifyingly confident girl in his neighborhood and imagines the life of the first man to drink milk.

Garfunkel & Oates sing about Pat Robertson, smug pregnancies and orgasmic Go-Karts.

David O'Doherty lays down sweet keyboard tunes about Shakira, the Internet and text messages.

Jesse Popp covers everything from surviving life without health insurance to his true feelings about "Star Wars," Guinness World Records and the moon landing conspiracy.