Crank Yankers

Elmer calls about anal beads; Special Ed calls a record store looking for a certain song.

Spoonie Luv looks into karate, and Terrence rents a candy store for the iconic Rosie O'Donnell.

Snoop Dogg calls about running for public office; Hadassah has a run-in with a salesperson.

George Zucco calls about swelling testicles; Bobby Fletcher hits an innocent bystander.

Hadassah calls about a perfume rash on her vagina; Ken repeatedly asks a caller to hit the pound key.

Gladys gets glued to a toilet seat; Steven calls a talent agent and keeps doing Bobcat Goldthwait impressions.

A blind stripper applies for college; Dick Birchum wants swimming lessons for his conjoined twins. Yanker voices: Lisa Kushell, Adam Carolla, Ian Black, Jim Florentine, Jimmy Kimmel, Katie Kimmel, and David Wain.

Bobby Fletcher can't stop burping; Adam Carolla and Dr. Drew Pinsky talk hip-hop.

Elmer calls about a gay cruise; Danny seeks out the help of a rabbi.

Spoonie Luv calls for driving lessons; Niles Standish wants a balloon ride. Yanker voices: Tony Barbieri, Fred Armisen, Susie Essman, Jim Florentine, Katie Kimmel, Kevin Kimmel, and Sarah Silverman.

Special Ed goes out to the ballgame; a sleazy professor calls a co-ed.

Gladys calls for a conjugal visit; Ken gets stuck in a restroom.

Hadassah tests her boyfriend's sperm; Jeff needs a job.

Hadassah tests her boyfriend's sperm; Jeff needs a job.

Cammie calls about her haunted breast implants; Tony Deloge tries to get a free meal.

Elmer calls about gay porn on his computer; Adam Carolla and Dr. Drew reach out to their listeners.

Cammie inquires about hourly car rentals; Dick Birchum needs some kids to work around the house.

Gladys gets intimate with slime; Elmer needs the lotto numbers.

Bob Odenkirk tries to overcome a speech impediment; Samir wants to throw a party.

Elmer calls a brothel looking for a woman he met 30 years ago; Marion inquires about plastic surgery for her 11-year-old daughter.

Bobby and Billy Fletcher call to make a reservation at a restaurant and Hadassah receives a sexually suggestive toy from her mother.

Cammie wants to teach kids about the birds & the bees; Gladys has questions about her teenage son's breast-milk habits.

Homeless, retired R&B singer Stompie looks for love; Hadassah becomes a telemarketer.

Gladys hits the jackpot at a broken ATM; Niles asks a salesperson to eat a used tissue for $500.

Elmer looks for charitable donations; Special Ed needs a piano lesson.